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I Never Thought I’d Be Wearing a Toupee at 46, But Here We Are

3 months ago 89

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I got bangs! I vowed to become more of a hat person, adding a few dad caps and a Stetson to my wardrobe. Then, I ordered some inexpensive, pre-tied headscarves in hopes that I might look chic and not like I’m wearing a half-assed Little Steven Halloween costume. But sometimes you just want to look like you have more hair, period. I didn’t feel like a candidate for a full wig—and as a theatre nerd, I already know I don’t love wearing them—so when the concept of a topper was brought to my attention, I immediately leaned in.

Let’s be so for real right now: A topper is, for all intents and purposes, a toupee. That’s a very unglamorous way to put it, I know. Toupees are typically thought of as a solution for bald men, not women—and not a particularly believable solution either. They’ve been visual punchlines for as long as any of us can remember; if the mere mention of toupees made you think of Stan from The Golden Girls or the grandfather from Christmas Vacation, you’re not alone. But a topper, aside from its somewhat similar name, is aimed at those of us with longer hairstyles, and unlike a toupee’s typical adhesive, it clips on to the hair you already have.

“A topper is ideal for anyone experiencing medium to advanced thinning,” says Haven Whiteman, a hairstylist and extension specialist with Luxy Hair. The brand, best known for their clip-in and halo extensions, also makes human-hair Remy toppers in more than a dozen colors. “Unlike clip-in wefts, toppers are designed to add coverage and density across the top of the head, sides, and crown—areas where thinning is most noticeable.”

Picking a color is taking a pretty pricey gamble—a $200 one if you’re lucky enough to catch them on sale. (Some companies offer to match you based on a photo, while others let you order a swatch for a few bucks.) Even though I kind of knew what to expect when I received a few toppers to try gratis because of my job, I was still taken aback by how they kind of look like disembodied scalps, with a firm, mesh base hiding under the hair. But as weird as that is, I had to appreciate how realistic they look; I was especially impressed by the quality of the feel and nuanced color. But I wasn’t so sure it would look realistic on.

Although you can wear it right out of the box, Whiteman says human-hair toppers can be customized just like your own hair. I turned to my stylist, Billy Hannam at Anushka Spa & Salon in Palm Beach, to help me figure out how to make these toppers look like I’m… not wearing one. He’s been helping me shape my existing hair to seem as not-scant as possible, so I trusted him to transform them into a natural-looking part of my shaggy, layered style. After comparing three toppers, we spent my appointment focused on a dark brown, 12-inch long style with pre-cut bangs by Irresistible Me, a brand that also uses human hair for their toppers, extensions, and wigs. The color was an outrageously perfect match, and the bangs would make it easier to blend into my existing cut.

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